very good

Little playmate’s mom just left and I will walk her back to her house with the girls in half an hour. Her mom is actually very sweet and seemed to me to be someone I could actually really enjoy befriending. I can’t believe I just said that. But also I am really glad. She has the names of some GP’s to pass on to me and a local kid-friendly dentist too. Yay! I was having fantasies about getting confrontational that were pretty unfounded, but my brain just works that way…I get really defensive when people think I’m shopping for spirituality just because I don’t believe in an organized religion and I think not knowing some things about God and the universe and life after death is more important than untested faith. I am somewhat of a Christian, just not by the common definition, I am somewhat of a buddhist, as much as the practice makes any sense to be called a singular religion, I practice pagan rituals, I feng shui my house, I interpret my own horoscope, I burn effigies, I meditate, I pray, I learn.

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7 thoughts on “very good

    • I actually prefer compassion to confrontation

      but my personal fantasies tend to disagree! I never would have gotten so confrontational with a certain someone if they hadn’t started making incredibly sexist statements and then backpedalling from them using religion as a cover. A very bad cover.

      • Re: I actually prefer compassion to confrontation

        And I agree that compassion is better than confrontation. I honestly try not be a prick sometimes. But it’s so frustrating when people do that kind of thing because they believe no consequences will come of their behaviour and that I am simply willing to bite my tounge rather than risk a scene. /shrug. I geuss you’re preaching to the choir regarding certain people. Hopefully the whole trend of not being so tense will continue. Thanksgiving was incredibly surpirsing and hope inspiring.

        Also… confrontation is such a rush. =)

      • Re: I actually prefer compassion to confrontation

        Actually, they believe in consequences to their behaviour: they will get through to your weak sinful self and save you, which for me is so insulting its not a matter of biting my tongue, its a matter of being firm but tactful. I failed at tactful but I’m brushing up on it.

  1. I love your last sentence!
    However, you have confused me. I thought you’d mentioned being an atheist before. I thought atheism was a lack of belief in divinity not lack of religion. You sound like you’ve got your pulse on the divine quite well, just no one religion that speaks your truth.

    • Many spiritual paths speak truth to me, but organized religion is a big turn off. I consider myself both Christian, pagan, and buddhist and I believe in god/dess. I think in a recent post I mentioned being on the other side of atheism from my husband, as he went through a less theistic conversion to quasi-buddhism, but sometimes he refers to god too. And he totally makes fun of me and my beliefs sometimes too, and the very small part of me that is rational thinks I probably deserve it. He is more strict about not bringing explicitly Christian stuff into our home. I think as I demonstrate my ability to innoculate my kids against the more viral strains and nurture a sense of inner spirit without it he may relax about that too. Jesus was way cool, it was that fucker Paul who went and made such a mess of things. But I know in my heart that that god forgives even those who have twisted and distorted those teachings.

      • I think in a recent post I mentioned being on the other side of atheism from my husband

        Sorry, I’d misread that. I was thinking that you two were two different types of atheists from that sentence. Ooops!

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